Trying to find Myself...........

Strange isn't it? You keep on groping about for some good, nice topic to blog on and then in an extraordinary act of serendipity someone just says something and you go like 'just wait a second....' ! One of my dearest friends was talking about the academic blemishes in life and said 'who am I?'. That set me thinking. In this blur of assignments and projects and God knows what else, we are leaving so much behind. Do we really know who we are?

I would really like everyone to at least once read Barrack Obama's Dreams from My Father. If you don't know Barrack Obama, you are probably from Mars. The book although an autobiography of sorts, tends to dwell a lot on the issues of racism and Obama's struggle to grasp his own true identity. I don't know why but somehow I could connect with his struggle, although he grew up in Hawaii whereas I grew up here in Mumbai.
Everybody has some nascent dreams in him or her. Its very rare that you find the choice to go along with your aptitude to follow what you want to; maybe you wanted to be rocker, maybe a railway-driver, an electrician, I remember telling my mom that one day I would become Superman! Try telling that to yourself one of these days! The point is that we have all become so engrossed in 'growing up', in doing what is right, we've left the child in us behind. The small child who wondered what made the moon disappear in the morning has been replaced by an 'adult' who does not give a damn about the moon anymore, only about securing a place at JBIMS.
The Matrix tells us that life is all about choice! Do you want the red pill or the blue pill ? All of us inadverently end up taking the latter. Where are the days when we were so carefree that time was not the 4th dimension, winning the cricket match was? Where are the days when choices were made not because of any considerations but just because we wanted it to be so. Gone are those days of glory, of hope, of despair, of boucing back, then of glory all over again!Life is cruel, it kills the child inside us and forces it to be an adult. Bound on all sides by the chains of responsibility, shackled and kept prisoner in the solitary confinement of academic exellence, it forces us to break down and submit, to tap out to its pressures.
But HOPE springs eternal my friends! With every dark cloud there is always the silver lining, no matter what! The fight is long and hard, but it will be fought nonetheless. Victory is no guarantee but the attempt will be made. I will find myself, cause deep down in the recesses of my heart, there is a small chamber. There at once protected as well as overshadowed by Life lives the child that was, no, is me. To get the child out of darkness into the light is the challenge that I have taken upon myself. Probably that is what life is all about.............
Finding yourself

Aging is not 'lost youth' but a new stage of opportunity and strength.
-Betty Friedan

YOU BETCHA!

cheers,
moksha